My Cup Runneth Over

My heart is heavy tonight. I have spent much of the day in prayer for so many things. I am thankful for so much, but in the same token I am also saddened by much. A very dear friend is going through a difficult time right now. My heart aches for her and her family. If only I could snap my fingers and make it all disappear. Stress can be such an ugly thing.

When I see my family or friends wading through troubling waters it reminds me of how truly human we are. We think we are so strong, that we can handle anything, but in reality we are meager humans who cannot handle anything alone. Alone is the key word here. Without God on our side we cannot deal with the stress in our life. The devil works so hard to break us. Picture your faith in a porcelain cup. Then imagine a crack in it (stress, sadness, trials, tribulations, etc.). The Evil One is great at wiggling his way into that crack and penetrating our faith, that is if we allow it. No matter how strong you think your faith is, in reality it is quite fragile. The smallest weakness can allow our faith to slip and the devil a space to work through and insert the tiniest bit of doubt.

God, in His infinite power,  can mend that crack and strike the devil out in an instant. Just as quick as he slithered into our porcelain cup he will be thrown out of it.

To think of God’s amazing power is so humbling. To simply sit and imagine the hands that formed the universe, the galaxies with the many stars, the Earth with its many beautiful wonders, and even the smallest most intricate workings of the life all around us is truly amazing (for lack of a better word). And to think that the Person who made all of these things formed our inner most being. While we were yet to make our appearance into our mother’s womb he knew who we would be, what we would look like, and how our lives would unfold before Him.

How can we not want to put our trust and faith, our very lives, into those more than capable hands? The very thought of others in the world who don’t even know my Lord saddens me to the very core. To think of others walking this very Earth carrying their heavy burdens alone, to not know the very peace and joy of my God absolutely breaks my heart. I cannot imagine a life without Him. He is my sole Comforter. In times of darkness and trouble He is my refuge. In times of weakness He is my strength. I can’t tell you how many times friends have asked me “How do you do what you do day in and day out?” My answer is simply…God. Without Him, I am nothing. I am weak, little, and have a life with no purpose or value without God by my side. He is my everything.

The only thing that we can do for our dear friends and family who are carrying burdens much to heavy for their shoulders is to pray for them. To pray that God’s holy presence will fill the void in their very souls. That His comfort may be ever present in these most difficult times. And most of all that they would come to know and love the very God who created them and who loves them without limits.

My ultimate prayer is that everyone I touch or meet in passing will come to know my Lord and that I would be a true witness of His, that His light and love would shine through me. I want them to see Jesus in me.

CDO…*OCD In Alphebetical Order*

I will let you all in on a little secret about myself. When my house starts showing signs of messiness I begin to get frazzled. Talk to my husband and I’m sure he will back me up on this. He says I turn monstrous when things start looking out of the norm. I like everything to be in their homes, organized, and even smelling nicely. There is just something about a clean house that makes me happy right down to my bones. With three children running along beside me, I have to stay busy and on task with daily chores in order to keep my house the way I like it. If I drop the ball at all and start seeing things unravel I begin to feel out of control of my environment. This is only the top of an iceberg called Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.  OCD is nothing to scoff at.

I have ticks like not walking on grates in the road or the corner of the road on the sidewalk that collects rain water because they cause me extreme discomfort. The fact that I count light poles, trees, and lines in sidewalks. I will never ever grab the first item off of a shelf or rack in a store, it has to be the third item back. I absolutely HATE touching shoe strings it literally makes me wince from the pain I get in my teeth when I do (hence my children only having velcro or buckle shoes). I truly dislike riding in elevators, using public bathrooms, touching buggys at the store, and the list goes on. If I kept going I would end up writing a book. Sometimes my husband does get a kick out of watching me do these things and we will have a good laugh. To him its just weird and funny, but to me it can cause literal pain or extreme discomfort. Laughing it off sometimes does make it easier. I will say as a side note that when people make comments like “I wish I had OCD” it upsets me because if they really knew what they were saying they wouldn’t wish it on anyone, including themselves.

I am who God made me to be. He must have a reason for giving me this to carry around. Honestly, I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t have OCD. Everyone has something they have to deal with. We just figure out how to make it work and life goes on.

Fact is, my house is clean and that makes me happy! =)